STEPS YOU SHOULD CONSIDER BEFORE YOU GET MARRIED
1. BE A LOVER OF GOD
It's important to have a relationship first with God before considering entering a relationship and it shouldn't be primarily to get a right partner but to have a fellowship with God. I must say that, as much as God is important for you to choose the right partner, you'll need Him much more to keep the person. That is why you need God not just for a partner but to have a personal relationship with Him.
2. NEVER MARRY AN UNBELIEVER OR SOMEONE WHO IS LUKEWARM
I don't know why someone who is a child of God would ever try to consider marrying an unbeliever, saying he or she would change him or her. That's something you'll get yourself to weep for. It's important to marry someone who is more mature spiritually than you are or on the same level as you and not one who is even lukewarm spiritually.
3. NEVER OVERLOOK ANY NEGATIVE BEHAVIOUR
Most singles today would prefer to keep a relationship on the notion of "she will change". Listen, marriage does not change people, whatever you see in your partner today during your courtship, you'll get double of it in marriage. Marriage doesn't build maturity in people, no, not all; you've got to be mature to get married. Don't overlook that negative behaviour from your partner. Ask questions.
4. LET YOUR PASTOR KNOW ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIP
Why hide your relationship from your parents or pastor? Inform your pastor that you're in a relationship and, the purpose isn't for confirmation of if you are with the right person or not, you should have known that before now and carried him along. I am sure your pastor would want to ask you some questions to shake your doubt and help your claims that that person is the one, you may now choose to either tell him the truth, lie or keep things from him. He can't force you to marry or not to marry the person but you'll bear the consequences yourself.
5. MEET EACH OTHER'S PARENTS
Now this is the introduction that people do, but as a way to make your partner known to your parents and he should make you known to his parents. If one of you is hiding this part then maybe you're not ready for marriage. The first responsibility of getting into marriage is to be able to show your partner to your parents. They would have been expecting this so, let them be aware and get their go-ahead. Peradventure they then don't like or accept your partner, pray and ask your parents questions. They may have their reasons for it.
6. SPEND TIME IN COURTSHIP
Though in my new book you'll get to read about this more, I will say you should take time in your courtship. Don't spend one month in courtship and then commence wedding preparations towards getting married. That may not be good enough. Most folks who come for counselling, one major problem which is common to them is that they never spend time in courtship. People don't take courtship period seriously or very important but I must tell you, you need to be serious with your courtship period. There are some things you need to know about the person you intend to marry...
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